things worth bringing back from the 50's

The New York Times had a recent article about the preponderance of 50's nostalgia in recent advertising. Supposedly in hard times it's nice to think back to simpler days. I agree. And since I wasn't around in those simpler times (not being born and all) I have decided to bring back all my 50's favorites, all of which I never actually experienced, but seemed quite great in movies. Or at least quite better than now a days.

1. Drive-ins
Drive-in movie theaters, truly ahead of their time. Now imagine all the trouble one could get into at a drive-in. Especially now that we have tinted windows. In fact, you could fit a whole party in a Hummer. Yes, a movie watching party. Get your minds out of the gutter boys. I only go as far as heavy petting, till I'm pinned.

2. Soda ShopsMilk Shakes. Root Beer Floats. I would love for it to be socially acceptable again to have a milkshake everyday after school. And since I am no longer in school, to pretend like I am in school, and have a milk shake everyday.

3. Kenickie

Now I know he wasn't real but I loved me some Kenickie. I mean a hickie from Kenickie was like a hallmark card. A pregnancy hallmark card that is. Yup Kenickie was that good. Plus, it's really sad to see jeff conway in his current drugged out celebrity rehab state, I'd prefer to think of him in the hotter days of yore.

4. Breakfast
And I mean real breakfast. Pancakes. Bacon, on top of ham, on top of eggs, on top of frenchtoast, on top of pancakes, drenched in maple syrup.

5. Awkward catchphrases
They just all sounded so much sweeter than today's slang. They really don't make them like they used to. Here's my rough translation.

Then
Why you're the bees knees
Now
You ain't nuttin but a chickenhead.
Then
I had a Blast
Now
I liked it when you back that thang up ho
Then
Let's go steady
Now
Boo be my Baby Mama
Then
Gee-Whiz
Now
Jizzz